*eye wink* *shoots finger gun*” on my tombstone as a replacement. I then tried to go with, “Bet you didn't know you could die with a boner. I once called up a tombstone place and asked if they would put “Help! Dig me up! I'm not dead!” on mine. They won't just put any 'ol thing on your tombstone. Even money that one of you guys is going to wake up in a hotel room with, like, three or four hookers in the next year or so. You're gonna do hella worse shit growing up. I remember wearing a lot of Hollister shirts, but that's it. You know what I remember from when I was 21? Nofuckingthing, is what. “It seems to me that when I die these words will be written on my stone”ġ. But if she tells me HER BONER'S PUSHING HER TO THIS DECISION, well, bro, I mean, you just gotta do whatever you can to win that girl back. I'm saying, if a girl tells me she doesn't feel the same way about me, that's whatever. Replace the “s” in “bones” for “r” and malibooyah: You've got something special here. This was one letter away from being a truly great line. “She told me in the morning she don't feel the same about us in her bones” That's a little thing called a history lesson, homie. First he won that dance contest, then he fixed up the Double Deuce, then he possessed Whoopi Goldberg and made her make out with Demi Moore, and then he wrote the Declaration of Independence. Do you know how many people it took to write it? One, bro: Patrick fucking Swayze. The Declaration of Independence is the greatest document of all time. Did you know that eight people wrote this song? EIGHT. That leaves us with only the bones of the track. That nobody in One Direction can really sing or dance, which should've been more of a problem so far considering THEY ARE A BOY BAND AND BOY BANDS USUALLY SING AND DANCE.ģ. That One Direction has officially entered the stage of their career where they begin to try to leap from Boy Band to Credible Rock Musicians. Or like they're starting their own nondenominational church.Īnalysis: Let's ignore three things here. History: A long time ago there were barber shop quartets and then after that the New Kids On The Block, and more recently five UK dudes were like, “We're One Direction” and they were a hit.Ītmospherics: Like the boys are suddenly really into Mumford & Sons.

One direction history my life